Friday, March 30, 2007

Terminator vs Jesus



Brilliant.

Thursday, March 29, 2007

Things I've figured out by myself.

The homophobic often make the claim that being gay is a choice, which seems rediculous to most straight or openly gay people, because we just simply look at the gender we do not preference and say: "nup, not doing anything for me. Them's the breaks."

It's not complicated, they just don't get the juices flowing. Willing but not able.

I had a thought though - the seemingly strange homophobe idea that its a choice may simply stem from the fact that it IS a choice - to them.

Not that it SEEMS like a choice, it IS a choice. They're gay, but they CHOOSE not to be. And they despise the fact all these cunningly attractive homosexuals, and they way they wiggle oh-so temptingly, taunt them away from their choice.

Why would you choose to be gay? It may be trendy in some way, but it's hardly convenient. Why would you choose to be straight? Ooh, where to begin. Persecution? Hatred? Fear? Shame?

Stop bashing gays or get out of the closet. That's your choice.

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Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Hicks scores holiday.

It seems David Hicks will face the harshest prisons we can throw at him, or as he will see the situation: he’ll be rewarded with a holiday.

Suspected terrorists? Violate their rights!
Actual terrorists? Free international flight to comparative vacation camp*

I feel safer already.

* Flight dependant on the political convenience of plea.

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Monday, March 26, 2007

Chaser's Countdown.

What the hell is this?



There's some sort of weird Chaser countdown reality-TV website, like a freakish late night quiz show but without any overtly obvious purpose whatsoever. People seem to sit around in a room, making idle words, strewn with a reminder of the countdown and taking phone calls and SMS's.

Best check it out soon, there's 2 days left of counting down to go.

I'm as excited as the next bloke, but.. odd.

http://www.countdowntothechaser.com.au/

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Thursday, March 22, 2007

Gut-full.

I think I may have just had a gut-full.

I’m growing incredibly tired of Labor’s attacks on the Greens.

Firstly it was Morris Iemma’s slamming their drugs policy. Saying they are out of touch, it will never happen, "it is just an absurd and ridiculous and disgusting policy."

*sigh* Thanks. Thanks heaps for that, I wasn’t aware – when Family First, the Liberals, Exclusive Brethren, and random right wing columnists, bloggers and others made the same judgement, I just wasn’t paying attention.

It’s not absurd, ridiculous or disgusting. It’s logical, proven effective (unlike the current strategy, which doesn’t appear to be working), and recommended by drug NGO’s. I doubt Iemma believes the policy is so repulsive either, he is simply exploiting a double-whammy by scoring points with the average-Joe as well as tainting the Greens with the extremist brush.

Harm to the Greens helps the Labor party, but it doesn’t help the left-wing cause. Nor does it raise the ALP up the moral ladder. What are the NSW Greens doing with their preferences in response to Iemma’s attack? Still giving them to the ALP of course. The Greens will once again help elect the same party that molested them.

Paul Austin hits the mark in today’s Age.
The emergence of the Greens as serious players on the Victorian political stage… has exploded the myth that Labor and the leftist minor party are somehow de facto partners against the conservative forces. In fact, the Greens are an electoral threat to Labor in its heartland.

Bracks relished the face-to-face combat with the Greens during the campaign, rejoiced in his success in putting down the Greens challenge in the lower house, and is on a mission to ensure the Greens never do as well again at a Victorian election. The tactic now is the same as it was during the campaign: to link the Greens hierarchy — the strategists and now the MPs — with the Liberals, when the average Greens rank-and-file member regards the Liberals as beyond the pale.

Labor's campaign manager… reckons he knows why the Greens' support fell away in he last days of the campaign. He has told cabinet and caucus members it was because of Labor's loud assertions that the Greens had done a secret preferences deal with the Liberals.
Labor is quite proud of its slander.
Labor strategists believe it is electoral poison for the Greens to be seen to be in bed with the Liberals. That's why the Government is now talking up the Greens' voting record in the upper house. In the 30 or so split votes since November 25, the Greens have never sided with Labor. Not once. They have, almost without exception, voted with the Liberals.
The Greens haven’t sided with Labor, and with good reason. They voted for more government transparency – a left position. Liberals want it because it will help their numbers (they are against such things when in power, so it’s a shift of position). Labor voted against it because it will expose their shame. Greens voted for it because IT WAS THEIR ELECTION PROMISE TO DO SO. The Greens aren’t siding with the Liberals, the Liberals are siding with the Greens.

The Greens and their supporters want things changed and fixed. It’s not easy, it’s frustrating at every turn trying to be green/left. Infuriating even. Case in point - a fellow-traveller today got gang-mocked during his lunch break by apolitical peers when discussing global warming – for suggesting it was even remotely a concern. Right-wing assaults are expected, the inability for the average-Joe to read all party policy and judge for themselves is wearisome, but ALP (or Democrat) assaults to gain popular votes in spite of progressive progress are an absolute disgrace.

The decision to put Labor second is not automatic, it is pained over. This crap will only make that decision a little easier.

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Monday, March 19, 2007

I (didn't particularly) wanna be sedated.

"Twenty-twenty-twenty four hours to go I wanna be sedated
Nothin' to do no where to go-o-oh I wanna be sedated
Just get me to the airport put me on a plane
Hurry hurry hurry before I go insane
I can't control my fingers I can't control my brain
Oh no oh oh oh oh.
"

(Methinks the Ramones were a little ahead of their time.)

Also, I've speculated that future history classes will discuss the (national disgrace) David Hicks situation more than (just another PM) John Howard. Currently on Wikipedia, John Howard's article is 15 pages long, David Hicks' is already 16.

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Friday, March 16, 2007

The Impersonator

The Pentagon has released further confessions of terror suspect, Khalid Sheikh Mohammed - claiming it proves that torture provides excellent testimony. According the transcript, Khalid (pictured) has confessed to starting World War 1, sinking the Titanic, and impersonating Ron Jeremy*.

* It had to be said, we were all thinking it - don't pretend you weren't.

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

News Crunch.

China to cut executions. The number of executions in China is a state secret, but we are now to be assured that whatever it is, it’ll be slowly reduced. Mmm.. comforting.

Greens groups slam 'ghost flights'. An airline has been running passenger-free "ghost flights" for five months to hang on to a prized landing slot at Heathrow. I just want to know if the ghosts are carbon neutral.

Leftie me. Cartoon hero Michael Leunig brings out big sarcastic word-guns and opens fire. Classic.

Out of the $410 million spent in the Federal Government’s $500 mil low-emission technology development fund, $335 mil went to fossil-fuel, and $75 mil to renewable sectors. Weak.

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

The Work-Life Balance



I thought I'd mess around with Flash today and see how hard it'd be to whip up a simple, yet thought-provoking, animation. So I did.

(It's just easier to chuck it on YouTube instead of finding a Flash host.)

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Wiki-Hunt

OK, this is lame, and I have no life. I call it.. um… a Wiki-Hunt.

You decide on a prominent article in Wikipedia, and your goal is to reach that article via links, starting from a random article.

I tried it, to see if it works – check it out:

Desired article: Jello Biafra.

Clicked Random Article, got:
Lysogeny broth, a nutritionally rich medium used to grow bacteria. Not sure where to go, I click on:

Vitamins. It has a link to Russia, when it mentions that in 1881, Nikolai Lunin studied the effects of scurvy.

Russia. It has a link to the USA.

USA. Now it gets tough, there are many places to go here. I chose conscription for some reason – sounds like something he’d be against.

Conscription. That links to libertarians. Getting warmer.

Libertarianism links to Green libertarianism, which links to Green Party (US), to Ralph Nader, to Category: US Green Party politicians, to Jello Biafra.

It works! But I don’t think it’s much fun.

Monday, March 05, 2007

ALP bites Greens.

The Bracks ALP state government is accusing the Greens of:
* hypocrisy
* trying to help the Liberals win government
* the Greens had moved closer to the Liberals
* it's a natural coalition of convenience but there is extraordinary hypocrisy
* the state Greens and state Liberals are tactically planning every single step in Parliament
* they work in total tandem, they operate together
* they are as tight a coalition in Parliament as the federal Liberal and National Party coalition are in Government
* the Greens were attempting to weaken Labor to win seats from them at the next election
* the hypocrisy of this is they make it more likely to have Liberal governments
Labor's leader in the upper house, John Lenders, said that on every vote where the two major parties had split in the Parliament, the Greens had supported the Liberals.

He said the parties were on different ends of the political spectrum and it would be like Labor having an alliance with One Nation.
Sounds nasty.
But Greens MP Greg Barber said the Greens were only doing what people had
elected them for.

"The Greens platform at the last election, above all else really, was to make the Parliament work, to give it the tools to do its job," he said. "That's what we've been doing, pretty successfully, and the Government doesn't like it."

Mr Barber defended the Greens' ability to work with the Liberals. "What he (Mr Lenders) is saying is 'if you are not with us, you're against us'. Where have I heard that before?" he said.

The Greens were only trying to give Victoria "the most open and accountable Parliament there is", he said.

Mr Barber said that when Parliament resumed, the Greens would push to make key parliamentary committees more independent and give the Parliament more power to demand documents from the Government.
Greens count the gains

Victorian Greens MP Greg Barber says his party's achievements within the first three weeks of Parliament include:

■ Reforming question time.
■ Establishing a gambling inquiry.
■ Allowing more time for private member's bills and debates.
■ Allowing equal speaking rights for all parties and members.
■ Proposed donation law reform.

From what I’ve seen, the Greens haven’t strayed from the goals stated in their election campaign. “Mr Barber also vowed to pursue the continuous reform of Parliament… But it was on poker machines that Mr Barber indicated the Greens would push the Government hard.” - from Greg Barber's maiden speech.

That’s not hypocritical, that’s doing exactly what they said they would. Increasing accountability and transparency, establishing a gambling inquiry isn't going to damage a decent government.

*ahem*

Latest news bits.

Howard 'very angry' over Hicks delay

How does he make the transition from 5 years of indifference to very angry? What an act.






Gangland lawyer, Zarah Garde-Wilson, in court accused of owning an unregistered pistol.

Letters to the editor confirm: many males content to have her own their unregistered pistols.

This just in - despite News Corps stake in Fairfax, The Age still totally refuses to go down the Page 3 Girl route.

This also just in - The Age also has a gallery of "Melbourne's glamour lawyer", with plenty of cleavage and tight busty attire! Classy.




Keating comes to Rudd's defence
On an issue absolutely no one cares about. Seriously, people haven't heard of Mr Burke, and they just don't give a flying.

Saturday, March 03, 2007

1000 words x 8

As Mikey and Jezza point out, the Liberal's site is all set for an election win, and the looping images at the top are great:

John Howard watches the shores.
Guardian against evil boat-persons.

(Must be an old photo - back when rain-coats had a purpose.)

John Howard deceives children with tall fishing tales, whilst demonstrating the open-hand, palms-facing-each-other technique used during elections.

Howard explains to Downer the open-hand gesticulation for the third time. Tony and Peter wish Alexander could learn things more easily.

After rounding up all the children that wave the Australian flag backwards, Howard begins the process of re-education.

Here we see one of the handful of people that have approached Howard over the years and said something positive about him, his party, and where he can shove his policies.

Peter Costello, the Treasurer. Not the leader, the treasurer. Here he is with financial data, because that is what he plays with all day, and that's not going to change. Ever.

Bra straps just fall off when the ladies see Howard's Akubra.

Howard demonstrates his patented double-high-five, perfected over his many successful elections.

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