Exclusive Brethren at it again.

Those Exclusive Brethren just can’t get a break. The Age got hold of a nasty little letter (which doesn't show up in their own search anymore - cease and desist maybe?) from a few years back, that pretty much said the following:

Howard will maintain economic prosperity.

It seems Howard’s Christian reign is the Exclusive Brethren’s reward for their “maintenance of the Divine standard". I’m not entirely sure why God can no longer be trusted, but it seems he needs a helping hand. Maybe they’ve strayed from their path, and direct action to support Howard is the only way.

There is an “Asian threat” that Howard will deal with.

We need to strengthen ties with the USA and Britain to ‘protect us from the Asian threat”.

And the Whitlam Labor government years were “awful”.

“There was (a) serious decline in moral standards resulting in bad laws, strikes and union strife, poor economic management, high unemployment, very high interest rates (and) difficult trading conditions”.

From Matthew, 21:12: “Thou shalt strive for good laws, obedient workers, weak unions, good economic management, low unemployment, low interest rates, and above all else (bar support of Jesus), thou shalt strive for a free market economy.”

(You sort of have to translate it a bit creatively, but that’s hardly new…A more accurate translation has Jesus having a bit of a hissy fit over people mixing business with religion – which is pretty much exactly what the Exclusive Brethren does.)

"The media have joined with the opposition to attempt to discredit the Prime Minister (John Howard) and make him a liar based on falsehoods …" they said. "We should be cast on our faces before God and be united in spirit and in prayer, so that He may come in for us in view of the present government being retained."

It’s a media-ALP conspiracy to call him a liar by lying about his lies! Howard is (or at least, his spin doctors are) mostly too clever to lie outright, but there are a few out there. But what I don’t understand is, how can you tell that the media is spreading lies when you are not allowed access to media due to your faithful convictions? How does that work? Did you accidentally glance at a newspaper and pick all that up? Without access to any form of media, how can you have the vaguest idea of what’s happening in the outside world, let alone anything resembling a (seemingly not obvious to the rest of us) detailed knowledge of modern politics and a current media conspiracy?

Maybe God told them? Must've.

Their ex-leader claims this is a “call to arms”, but the next day (and someone in the Brethren must got the heads-up from Jesus about the article in the newspaper about them) a certain Phil McNaughton from Beecroft NSW wrote a letter to the editor.

Phil claims the article had a “number of inaccuracies”. It wasn’t a call for action, it was just a call to pray for Howard to win (I guess the action that ensued from the call-to-action-that-wasn’t must have just been a misunderstanding.) Actually, not a misunderstanding according to Phil, just a coincedence.

All those occurrences, in the USA, New Zealand, Australian federal, Tasmanian, Victorian – coincidences. Just because Exclusive Brethren members in various locations just happened to do the same thing at the same applicable time, sometimes in the same format, is just a fluke.

They do regret the use of “Asian threat” as a term, what they meant was that ties with the US and Britain need to be totally solid especially due to the South-East Asian terrorism threat.

Because, y’know, helping them out in every single war thus far just doesn’t cut it. And, well, the US has been known to leave us both to die alone before, so it could happen again. And if anyone knows how to stop the terrorists, it’s those two.

Anyway, he continues thusly:

“Mr Bachelard claims the letter was signed by each of the church's state leaders. The church has no state leaders. In fact, four of the eight signatories live in NSW.” I have no idea how that last sentence has any purpose whatsoever. Four of the eight are from NSW? The other four could be from the remaining 5 states. And don’t chastise a reporter for inaccuracies about a secret cult – that’s like getting mad when someone doesn’t know the number you’re thinking of. There is only one leader, and that’s Jesus Christ. Actually no, it’s Bruce Hales. Sorry, I always get those two mixed up.

“The letter was written by concerned senior members of the church.” Oh, they weren’t leaders, just one Elect Vessel, and it’s just a simple little letter by concerned folk. Senior folk. That all signed it.

“Considering the outcome of the 2004 election, I am confident many Australians, whatever their religious beliefs, shared their views.” Oh so true, we’ve never been in so much debt, the country is on fire or burnt (no word on brimstone), there’s no water, interest rates are up, there’s a struggle to find homes, to simply survive, we can only make any money from selling rocks...

Yeah, I’m with you on that one.

(Oh, and under Rudd, the ALP might grow some balls and vote for the Greens renewed call for an inquiry, he's "concerned", but hasn't committed. Will update with the results.)